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Friday, July 11, 2014

Reflections From Victory's Crossing Church June 8

 Reflections From Victory's Crossing  Church, June 8th, 2014
from Growing Confident Kids to Growing Strong Adults and Relationships


A recent sermon at church was about growing confident kids. The Pastor talked about “speaking words of encouragement, loving unconditionally, making time for play and not undervaluing the time we have with our kids.” In a family context, he is absolutely correct! The importance of growing confident kids is a priority for all parents, or it should be.
I understood his message and believe it whole-heartedly. As a single mother, I can only hope that I have provided a strong foundation for my kids- in spite of the stressed and complicated reality that has been my norm for way too long. I hope that my children are still secure in what I was able to give to them- not mentally making a list of what they did not have. It's not all about the money, but even in respect to fun, like the saying goes, "Money can't but you happiness, but poverty can buy you nothing."  This year, I am trying to be mindful to make room for fun. I don't want their memories (or mine) to be full of missed opportunities.
Along that same line, I don’t want my friendships and other relationships to be full of missed opportunities either. As I reflect on the Pastor’s message, his points of loving unconditionally, making time for play and spending quality time are applicable to our other relationships too. We all need friends who love us, encourage us, and pick us back up when we fall.  AND YES, we all fall.
I am a firm believer that investing in people is incredibly valuable. Pastor Arlie is correct that quality time allows people to feel accepted and nurtured. Just as it is important for kids to feel secure in their identity, I think that is important for adults too. No one wants to feel judged or as if they are unworthy. When we sense that we aren’t accepted and loved, that self-doubting voice will try to dominate all thoughts. You can’t thrive when you are making decisions from a position of fear or insecurity.  
With that understanding, I am making a mental checklist to be mindful in how I treat others. I am normally mindful, but everyone has a certain amount of “mess” in their lives. If we wait for “the right- time” to see people, the right-time may be an optical illusion that never happens. I will not take my friendships for granted or let them lapse because I am too "busy". I have learned that life goes by too quickly if you let the time slip away. I have also learned that when time is shared, you capture a bit of it by holding that memory.
The thought for the day is: I will give of myself where I can and invest in the friendships that I have and any new ones along the way. At the end of the day, I don’t want to reflect on the things I didn’t give, or should have done.
Many years ago, when my mother-in law passed away, someone remarked that she had a way about her that made each grandchild feel as if they were her favorite.  What an awesome legacy to leave behind. For some people it comes naturally. For others, (like me) it may be a conscious decision. I say this knowing that I won’t be perfect, but I will do my best. We are all works in progress.

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To hear the sermon for yourself: http://victoryscrossing.com/sermons/your-id-in-christ-3/